Understand the reality of violence, but never live in the denial of it?

A simple thought for you to ponder over. If violence could be eliminated through a euphoric approach, why hasn’t it?

In the first two parts of this blog, we looked at “The Euphoric Approach” to preventing violence and also, where sadly, the divide exists between this ideal world philosophy and the reality of violence. Let us not forgot that all approaches to preventing violence play an important part and should support each other. Please be sure to read or listen to the first two parts of this blog.

Understanding violence is never as clear-cut as black and white. There are so many grey areas that should never be ignored. Although it is true that many that commit violence use excuses for their acts, we should never dismiss the reasons for violence. These contributing factors are what we shall be delving into.

Let us look at the sad reality of domestic violence as an example. A subject, so many has had to face. Although statistically, it is women that have had to deal with this the most, let us not forget that men are also subject to it. Typically an excuse for the violence will directly follow an apology. These excuses quite often blame the victim, alcohol, stress or something else… and yes these are excuses, but there are also contributing factors when facing the reality of violence. So, as much as we would like people to stop being violent towards others, are we living in denial if we think it will stop by asking people to do so?

Nowadays, many initiatives that focus on violence prevention or supporting the victims of violence, heavily believe in NOT putting the onus on the individual to learn to protect themselves. It is seen as sending the wrong message, and that the focus should be on those that commit the violent acts, not the victim. Although I most certainly do not disagree, this is an ideal world philosophy and therefore the euphoric approach. Therein lies the concern, as when learning to protect our selves from violence, the focus is on trying to prevent victims, to begin with. It is proactive in thinking and approach. As much as we shouldn’t have to protect ourselves from violence, reality has demonstrated time and time again that we do.

So, let us take a brief look at these contributing factors towards violence. We shall break this down into three sections and go into greater depth in future blogs. The purpose of this is not to provide a detailed psychological assessment, and certainly no excuses for those that commit violence by choice, but to provide a simple explanation that helps people to understand the realities of violence. And yes, to those that just had an emotional reaction to me indicating “violence by choice”, there is such thing as unintentional violence and that’s before we even look at the reality of violent stressors.

The first of three contributing factor categories are emotional stressors. These stressors include the likes of, mental illness, pain, abuse, unmet needs, and more. In addition, there are also environmental stressors such as cultural and social-based, income-related and more. The third category includes stressors such as substance abuse, lack of education and more.

It is important that when we look at all these stressors we do not get carried away with passing blame or not passing responsibility. Understanding the reality of violence is to understand what causes it. So, again, we not looking to give those that commit violence excuses for doing so, but to help us understand the importance of protecting ourselves from the realities of violence.

There may be no way of diplomatically putting this… If one is determined not to learn to protect themselves through the belief that they shouldn’t have to, or the expectancy of someone stopping the act of violence when asked to do so, how can this belief help them in a time of crisis?

I, like many other professionals that teach others how to protect themselves, fully support all initiatives that help prevent violence. Many of us would love for violence to end through the existence of euphoria, but we believe more than anything in providing people with the practical knowledge and skills to manage the realities of violence in the world we live in.

Hopefully, you read or listened to the first two parts. What are your thoughts so far?

Please remember to keep your interaction positive in thought and in response. The purpose of this continuing blog is to bring us together in understanding the roles we all play.

In part four and beyond we shall continue to look at the reality of violence through the understanding of the Contributing Factors toward violence.

Thank you for following and sharing this blog. Until next time!

To be continued…